Happy belated 2018! I wasn’t sure if I was going to write about this but having had some time during January to think about last year and the year to come I decided to sit down and tell you a little bit about the thoughts that have been going around in my head!
2017 was an exciting, exhausting and overwhelming year! Yes, I know, I haven’t really posted anything, just a couple of Instagram pictures, a blog post here and there and 2 videos on YouTube. While I was beating myself up last year about being so lazy about my Social Media, I remembered I had high hopes all the while I was leaving my old job in Germany and moving to Sweden.
In my mind I had a sound plan of what to post and when, how to decorate my apartment in just a couple of weeks, the new sports routine I wanted to follow, the guys to date and to change my life completely.
By the time fall came around I already felt like a big fat failure (and my expanding waist line did was a sign of that). I had done the same mistake again that I had done a couple of time in my life. I was unhappy in one place and moved to another thinking that things would change – I would change. Hoping to find a spark of energy that I was missing to “get my life into order”. Or in my case Social Media ready. Blogging and editing videos did not feel like a hobby anymore but more like a job I had to do…
Now you need to know a few things about me – I’m a big procrastinator! I envy people who *just do* things without giving them an apparent thought. I on the other hand keep reflecting and dreaming over and over again, painting a mental picture of perfection and before I know I don’t do it because I know it will never look like I imagined it to be, I took too much time and missed the opportunity or I can’t find my camera to shoot that picture because I haven’t organized my home so I can actually find things!
See, I’m one of those people that are not really lazy, I’m just a perfectionist with OCD in disguise. If I was as bad as I always think I am I would not have been able to graduate with a good degree, establish a career for myself and form long and lasting friendships! I also would not have been able to move to Swede, start a new job in which I must say I think I’m pretty good at, find new friends and travel the world in the past couple of months.
We humans have a tendency to look at the negative parts much closer than on what is actually good in our lives. The *what if – what could happen* takes up too much time and leaves us unhappy and anxious. So when a friend of my send me a text and asked me what my resolutions for 2018 are I just replied that I wanted to be happier and take better care of myself.
In the last couple of years I used to write big lists – much like the one when I came to Sweden- but never followed through. Like so many other people I’m just a creature of habit and changing my life drastically is just not something that fits my nature. What I can change though are my thoughts and my actions.
The first thing I did was to start meditating using an App to calm my mind. I figured if my mind was quiet and happy, the rest would follow. I know have meditated not every day but I manage to squeeze it in now and then enough to change my perspective a little. Be it on the train, on a plane or just in my bed it helps me to reduce stress not only from the outside but also from the inside!
Now, even when I had a bad night, I can get up and live my day a little bit better, a little bit more active without too much thought about what I should be doing but what I want to do!
2018 – I’m ready for you!
PS: I have tested several Apps and found that Calm is the one for me! Tell me, what app do you use to help you navigate the everyday?